In my business networking book ‘The Accidental Salesman Networking Survival Guide’ I talk a lot about building up a network of advocates and I show you how this is done.

In business networking terminology, an advocate is someone who is a dream contact. It is what word-of-mouth marketing is all about.

An advocate will go out into the market place and sing your praises and recommend you whenever they spot a need for your products and services. An advocate will do this without you having to pay them a penny!

I always say that one advocate is worth ten clients and much of my business networking activity is about building up a network of advocates. It’s like having a team of agents but not having to pay them any commission. Indeed, the best advocates would probably be offended if you offered them money for their continued advocacy. [Read more...]

One of my favourite books is ‘Influence : the power of persuasion’ by Robert Cialdini where he documents 5 key strategies used by highly influential people. One of these 5 strategies, reciprocity, is especially important to business networking. It’s a key feature of international business networking organisation BNI for whom the mantra is “If I give you business, you will want to give me business” – and it works.

According to Cialdini, humans seem to have this inbuilt need to reciprocate. You buy someone a pint of beer and they want to buy you one back. You do someone a favour and they want to return the favour. Whether this is nature or nurture is very debateable because, in my experience, some people are just happy to keep taking without any apparent desire to reciprocate.

Fortunately enough people in business networking do get the concept of ‘Givers Gain’ that BNI have done so well to evangelise. In my experience, however, there is one thing you need to bear in mind:

People will give back what you give

They may give back in different ways but it will be something they consider equal value to settle the social ‘debt’. They will rarely give you massively more than you have given.

The way some people give referrals, it’s like they give someone a glass of tap water expecting to get back a glass of fine wine. Sorry but it ain’t gonna happen!

Some people, for example, give a referral by doing no more than giving a name and number of a contact with no effort to make an introduction. With Google and LinkedIn that information these days can be gained with little effort. In sales terms a referral like that adds little. Unfortunately people are often too polite to give feedback except by not giving referrals back.

So my business networking tip is to give as you would like to get. If you want to get more quality referrals or you want to continue getting quality referrals, make sure you are giving quality referrals.

I am not very good at getting up at the crack of dawn. I am more of a night owl. One of the things that makes it all worthwhile, apart from the extra business, is being amongst positive, uplifting people. It sets up your day and you leave feeling on a high and ready for business. Who in their right mind would spend time and money going to meet people who make them feel down?

Networking is a people business and for it to work you need to be the kind of person others enjoy being around. If you want to become influential with highly connected people then they need to feel comfortable in your company. If they do not then they are unlikely to do business with you or want to refer you to people they know – no matter how talented you are.

If you find it hard being positive and uplifting, I know how you feel. Please don’t tell anyone but there was a time, many years ago when I felt the same. I always looked on the negative side of life. Every silver lining had a cloud and I would regularly criticise and complain about things. The sort of person I would now give a very wide berth. I knew this was a problem but I did not know what to do about it.

What I found from reading personal development books is that negativity is a habit and so is being positive and optimistic. It all depends on what you pay attention to. I used to pay attention to the worst in people. Now I pay attention to the best in people. I used to think about what could go wrong. I now think about what could go right.

I am not suggesting that you put on a false positivity or become all happy-clappy and Pollyanna. What I am saying is that in the world of networking a negative outlook will hold you back and you may want to invest in some personal development. Books like ‘How to win friends and influence people’ by Dale Carnegie is a good place to start.

Being uplifting is about making people you are with feel better about themselves. You just need to take the focus off yourself and put it onto them. Smile and find something you can sincerely complement and take an interest in. Give them your undivided attention and they will thank you for it.

When people feel good by being around you they will want to spend more time with you and they will be happy to introduce you to people they know. That’s not only good for business but it’s also great fun!

One thing I was taught very early on when I first started business networking was to arrive early. It was explained that some of the best connections are made before an event starts and it’s much easier to have a quality conversation.

This tip applies to any event and not just business networking meetings. You can add valuable contacts to your network anywhere and at most events there will be people who arrive before the crowds.

It does not have to be a business related event either. It can be any event where people gather. So consider arriving early for club meetings, committee meetings, and even parties and barbeques. As always you should be focusing on developing the connection and the relationship rather than talking about what each person does for a living but that inevitably comes up in conversation at some point.

If you find it difficult to start a conversation then use the fact you are early as an ice breaker. Say something like:
“I think I am a bit early, what time does it start?” or “I see you are early too. Have you travelled far?”

I must admit, I am not a morning person and so getting up at the crack of dawn to attend a business networking meeting over breakfast is hard work for me. Even so, I make the effort to arrive early for as I find it is always time well spent. The networking pros always seem to arrive early.

You know what they say about early birds and worms!

A big frustration of many experienced business networkers is going from having a good relationship with a potential referrer to getting the business to begin to flow. There are a lot of benefits which derive from business networking but for me the purpose of business networking is to generate business opportunities where the sales effort required is significantly reduced.

One thing you can do is to arrange to meet up with your contacts and focus specifically on helping each other win more business referrals. Being upfront about it as an outcome for the meeting will be refreshing to many.

Set up the meeting correctly to avoid any awkwardness by giving permission to ask for referrals. Say something like: [Read more...]